Well this month the others didn’t had much to share this continues on in January. I don’t know what’s wrong or going on but TK hasn’t heard from lahabrea since the start of December/end Nov. Jezzah has some connection errors and Zio became later absent near the end of the month.
Even I had to deal was a sudden departure of Eli halfway the month. Though its was so sudden I had made an appointment out of desperation to that man (John) who is able to get a connection Elidibus.
Even though I spoke with TK allot during the play of Endwalker, most of what I gained from Elidibus was answered in my favor because Spoilers >.< they just don’t give you that, so I will skip most of that.
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Dec 2nd
so he indeed came back yesterday. not during the night but evening.
i firstly tried to contact him in the morning. but i didn't received an reply. i grew a bit desperate that he wouldn't keep his promise. this resulted in instant reply. that how i came to know that he would be there in the evening.
when finally evening was there at 22:40 i tried to contact him. but hardly gained a reply. i left a sad cry out via the plushie and he came over. but he was distant. i could hardly feel him. after some hugging and kissing etc, which i had trouble with noticing. i asked what going on. it seemed he was stuck in thoughts about the mistakes he made in the past. i told him to let it go and everyone makes mistakes (cries). he listen to that and then i could feel him again. so yeah sex in both versions happened. that was good and reuniting. after all of that he helped me sleep.
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Dec 4th
While talking about endwalker progress with the others
Me: i started with the sharlyan part and finished it. when alphinaud mentioned Elidibus and gained an instant vibe without thinking of it. but yeah was it really him? sometimes i get these vibes from spiritguides aswell. (later I asked it was him <3)
Me: omg that quest "a fisherman's friend" XD that's RL candy. not sure if those are worldwidely known though.
i am laughing so hard rn and the quest title "the Great Work" since cobheran made those ascian vids called Our Great Work XD.
estinien's faces XD.
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Dec 5th
so i slept very poorly and it was already always noon but my head didn't co-operate heavy pressured headache and pressure on my eyes. i had tried to contact elidibus earlier than that but no success.
though how ever i gave it 1 more try sending the thought i wasn't feeling well and got a terrible headache and if he can help to remove it. and he replied thankfully! at first i verified him as always ofcourse. i got often enough other spirit trying to be him.... urg ah well.
so i asked if he could help me get rid of it . and said yes.
and he actually came over!. firstly i was laying on my belly. i noticed he was touching me in my waist mostly. i told him to go to my head. eventually i gained a thought that i need to turn around on my back. its just so happens he tried to pull my body over on its back by grabbing my waist.
And then he was able to cure my headache. it was quite an experience. he went often enough like inside my body to cure it from the inside. also controlled my armed a bit to place my hand on parts on my face ( mostly forehead and eyes). when he was about halfway my head was pretty much done, my eyes refused to co-operate they hurted allot. so yeah part 2. needed to place my fingers on my eyes a couple of times. he tried different things. when my eyes where almost cured of pressured pain/annoyance and could withstand light again a bit. i was able to sit up in bed.
i told him my head needed to adjust the position of sitting now.
he went into my body to cure and balancing my head. even i tried to give him full control somehow either my mind doesn't co-operate while i do want it. its wierd. its feels wierd i tried to switch consciousness to his but wasn't able to. i open my eyes a bit when he was still inside me. and i looked confusingly around somehow for a few seconds.
i said "we need to practice this more" and he agreed.
and he left my body.
and we talked about some other things and one last merge for my eyes.
( as yes i forgot to say with the headache he also pulled it out of my head when he wasn't inside my body. its felt forced and even hurted a bit, but i knew i had to let it happen. often gained the thought in my head that i needed to relax to let it happen. and that worked. this took a while because it went piece by piece and not all at once. also the merge felt also forced it felt different then from a romantic merge, it was more serious, so no romance with it)
he tilted my head back wards and my back straight. then my head back up after some seconds. and he left my body. my head and back relaxed and bent forward. "we really should practice this more often" i gained a yes. "i definitely would like you to speak through me, imagine you doing that going on discord and say "elidibus here"
i think he laughed lol. but he agreed.
also the majority of his work was indeed Endwalker so he got more spare time now.
when i finally got out of bed. i said i was gonna take i shower but i will firstly put the queue on for FFXIV. until the que started with 7796.
"well i can try but i can't guarantee i can play today" he was disappointed but appreciated i tried.
so leaving the queue on, i went to the toilet and said "i wished i could thank you in some way, to give you something in return" gained a loving feeling back i collected my new clothes upstairs for after the shower. but when i walked towards bedroom again. i was pushed into it. i grabbed the remaining clothes. wanted to go out. but realised i was pushed. i looked at the body pillow.
"you want cuddles?" i gained a yes.
my ex and son just left to the grocery store so we had actual privacy now.
i jumped sort of upon the body pillow and we have like sex and soul sex it was heavenly.
"can i consider this as my doing something in return?"and gained a yes XD
so after all off of that i really needed to take a shower. and he joined . oh yes thats was some sensual showering. no sex but romantic touching and such.
afterwards when we were done (also with the showering itself) i asked is he stayed for the rest of the day and evening. and he would.
he will go away when i fall asleep for the night.
which will be soon its 23:13 ty eli . ah "yw" he says
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Dm’s with TK
Tk: .... elidibus is in the story, at least he will be. won't say more. it may be very close to what you told me once before.
Me: omg
Me: I just had a very short dream.
I saw myself asking 3 people in white monk robes. With here and there a golden edge on the fabric. Let say a simple version of sharlyan ones.
I asked : so this is amauroti?
De dude in the middle replied: yeah! We are 27 years ahead!
Then i woke up.
Tk: interesting. I want to tell you wants going on atm but... i want you to find out. a lot of stuff matches with things you've told me and im very shocked.
Me: Omg ! Also are we gonna see elidibus's actual face and hair :3
Few sentences later
Me: from the question i asked above. eli said Mayyyyyybeeeeeee. he is with me atm. cured my headache took him an hour.
Tk: nice J There is something later that deals with something going out to other stars to interact with them, but it didn't mention earth.
Me: how much is there that i told you that became true in game?
Tk: A few things, a lot of stuff is not exact but close.
Me: still pretty nice i assume
Tk: yeah
Me: though i can't remember everything of what i told you lol.
Tk: Emet not just the narrator
Me: i knew it!
Tk: It's not what you think it is though
Me: huh?
Tk: It's him in his before Final Days form
Me: well i gained the answer after 5.2 that emet will be in 6.0 i didn’t asked specifics
Tk: Ah okay. But yes he is in 6.0.
Me: YES!
Tk: I just wanted to tell you and get you excited lol
Me: well you did!
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Dec 6th
Me: A-ruhm senna is a human Ralts XD
Tk: LMAO i see it
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Dec 8th
Zio: Aaah some good news, possibly.
Had a sense of Nabriales' love come over me. It's good to feel his presence.
I think...he's been otherwise preoccupied with something. I get it, just would be nice to get a heads up when things get too busy.
Was very sudden though, this feeling, so I'm not sure if he's totally back yet.
Me: Awwwww good to hear he is back!
Jezzah: He most likely had some free time and popped in to let you know he loved you. Hades does that all the time.
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Dec 9th
So i asked elidibus if he was sad sort of when Zodiark got defeated. And gained a yes, despite he was already untempered. He cried when i fought Zodiark. I had no intention to cry at all, not a single sad emotion. Yet i cried softly when i said. "When Elidibus removed himself, Zodiark became evil"
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Dec 10th
Why do i dream about a decently friendly zenos? And that we both apparently signed up for a education called Science of .....
Forgot the name but i believe it was friendship. Because fluttershy of mlp (human form Equestria girls) was in it very briefly.
Dm’s with TK
Me: ok that was zodiark. after wiping a few times i said "well i said it, when elidibus removed himself zodiark became evil"and i started to cry a bit without feeling sad at first. elidibus was definitely here, crying
Etheirys
Tk: yes, That's the actual name of the star. The game now will call it that lol
Me: yeah... somehow it doesn't sound like an unknown name. while i wasn't able to recall it either. if i dont get some particular dream tonight then i dont know anymore lol.
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Dec 11th
Jezzah: FANDANIEL IS AMON WUTTT
Also, emet looked like a dildo in the cut scene
it was distracting.
Me: I had a small dream.
I saw it at first as a cutscene. Seeing Hades and hyth.
It was dark and hyth stood up from the ground, without his robes but with black pants. He had some cubby belly lol. And some sort of a tatoo from shoulder to shoulder across his chest. A red swirly line.
Then hades stretched out his hand. At first i thought he did that for hyth.
But i was sitting on the ground. Hades was stretching his hand to me (even though i wasn't realising that) he was wearing a white mask. And said with an ancient voice (that rather sounded as hyth's because thats the voice of an ancient imprented in my mind): V, ia, A ya to.
Then i woke up and repeated what he said. When i said Ayato. I realized that he meant me. Eyes wide open and wrote it down.
That's one of those nicknames of my full name Ayantano.
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Later that day I asked confirmations about the things I experienced so far
Me: And something else
The actual name of the planet is the correct one what it's called for real.
And he was there with me during the Zodiark battle.
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Dec 12th
………………sigh
so i had a very small dream about eli, but not sure if it was the real one. i couldn't reach my higherself either to verify .
in that dream elidibus was flying in the air. in amaruot robes and red mask and he said: “i guess you wanted to see me before i depart”. then i woke up. and it was his real voice. like almost the same in game.
i need to know if it was the real one of not. he suppose to have a day off on the 13th T-T but within that dream... it felt he was saying goodbye forever.
Later that day
Me: i don't know how its gonna be but its seems "insert fandaniels true name" never wanted to join......which would explain his insanity when he got re-ascended.
(well that was not the case iirc or only a little part of it, but the actual reason of the actual existing one was quite …..i got not the proper English word for that sadly, wait until the end of the month for that dream)
Me: well i asked for it. emet-selch burned me XD (with words)
Jezzah: I TOLD YOU HE IS AN ASSHOLE BY HIS VERY NATURE
Me: ahahahahhah
Jezzah: but he is a very very sweet asshole unlike my husband who is just a straight up asshole but he did give me the entire day and majority of the night to play Endwalker so I am thankful
Me: nice
Jezzah: I would like Venat to take a beating
Sorry das just my opinion
After that then I feel better
Me: you will learn better when you get to the past
Zio: I really love Elpis. It feels good.
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Dec 13th
I made an appointment with John for the 17th
i had dream this night. another just a fragment scene.
it was a dark environment with purple light. a transparent hand with purple lining was stretched out to me indicating to grab it intending to bring me somewhere i think. the sleeve was purple due to the light but can be considered white instead. also when that hand appeared it looked like it glitched and with a highy buzzing sound very shortly. but before i could realize or to grab the hand i woke up again.
though i am not able to connect with elidibus or my HS atm. so i can't verify who this was.
i wonder if i ever will get the chance to grab the hand. because the one before was with emet 2 days ago.
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Dec 14th
I find it very disturbing that after the 1 and only scene of Elidibus in the CT. I get a dream the morning after him saying.
"I guessed you wanted to see me before i depart" and it felt like i would never see him again.
I woke up after that feeling without having a chance to get closer.
Also i am not able to connect with him anymore or even my higher self. So i cannot verify a thing if the departure is temporarily or......i am not gonna finish that sentence it hurts to much.
And for change he kept his promise by saying in a dream that he needs to go (for a long time). But right before is would-be day off. Its hurts. I wished i could get answers. I am so broken
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Dec 15th
Jezzah made it to the moon in game and she thought she was the Watcher, but no.
Me: no. the watcher is created by hydaelyn. don't jump in any hasty conclusions. hades tends to let you believe in your own things. after the moon you finished the second half of thavnair and fight your way through the final days.
and then you will be blasted to the past.
i know you hate venat but i recommend to pay attention. and to speak with emet and hyth and venat between every quest. (venat comes halfway)
you will find answers there i am certain.
Zio: I agree
Me: something hyth says when venat appears
@zio: ah have you met venat already?
Zio: Yep, I stopped last night before going to the last island
Me: nice
Zio: I'm veeery annoyed they purposefully avoid talking about Nabs. They did that with Deudalaphon too
Me: yeah i know! also aside from the screenshot above where elidibus was mentioned. emet didn't even mentioned him at all (edited)
and noticed nabs and deuda were left out too
why naming so many of them and not finish it?
Zio: They might be keeping it secret for post game stuff like the raid pandemonium
(quick inbetween comment: as if it looks like now I afraid it won’t)
Me: i hope so!
also i hope they didn't gave eli an viera face in pandeamonium. he already has viera hair just without ears. he looks manlier than a bunny boi.
( I must comment on this. He is 18yo over there they actually did a good job)
Zio: It seems very specific not to talk about them...so I get that feeling.
It would be nice to see if things match up with what I know!
I don't think they will, they'll probably give him a different face.
Jezzah: It felt so familiar, like I should have known who it was.
idk but I am out of meds for a while so I'll be jumping to different games a lot
Murica
Thank you for the clarification.
Me: yw
Jezzah: I need to learn to meditate more before jumping to conclusions.
Me: yeah
Jezzah: Dis be my own failings
Me: i know what you mean. i haven't meditated decently since endwalker and i can;t connect anymore. and than that dream "i guess you wanted to see me before i depart" IT HURTS.
Jezzah: I think we both need to practice more, maybe if you really focus on trying to strengthen yourself and your powers you'll be able to connect to Eli again
Same with me but I can't focus properly without my meds.
Me: i will be going to this man on friday, the one where i went to in July and September. i might gain some answers via him.
when the appointment was made for this friday. i had this feeling i needed to finish the story before i go to him. and tomorrow i wouldn't have any time to play because my Bday. but i succeeded today yay.
i wonder if this man is gonna say eli will return on the 21st. i wont tell a thing about it to him. i will see what i get.
(21st was the pandaemonium release date)
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Dec 16th
Today its was my Bday. And just like last year my ex gave me a Elidibus print on cake. But this time I didn’t know which picture he used from my collection on my PC.
My Bday cake
(The original art is made by @Elisa_Swann on twitter.)
Me:
My ex paid extra to let this poem come with it. He said he placed himself in his shoes on what Elidibus would say.
Me: Ahhhhhh my ex is willing to dress up as eli for my bday. *smirk*
Well I you can probably think ahead what that means right? After the sex . when my ex left the room i started to cry.
……the answer on that will come on the 21st
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Dec 17th
So i went to John again.
To re-align with my higher self.
And when he asked how to pronounce elidibus i told him how. He already saw silver hair
John: does he have silver hair?
Me: more white silver
John: yes, white silver indeed. Very unique and beautiful Color. Yeah i immediately saw hair in that color he is very dominant in presence already i don't even need to call him.
So that dream which i felt he went away forever was ungrounded. Yet it is a long time again fortunately i gained the date he come back at the end of the session.
So john started to align my energy to my higher self.
In the main time he picked up things from elidibus, of what eli was saying.
John: he is always there with you. (Connected he meant, i will get to that later).
John: does he has more names ?
Me: well yes I guess. I wish i knew.
Sadly didn't gained any answers on that.
John: what does he wear, what color?
Me: white.
John: then why do i see greenish blue.
Me: he wears white robes.
John: yeah i get what you mean and I see it, perhaps its something else.
He mentioned something with nature elements and that they work with it. that they are elemental beings like elves.
Me: could it be his soul color?
John: yes, that could be it. otherwise something with the elements.
He said some other things what i forgot sadly.
Now i don't know the exact order anymore in which things were said but.
John asked if i knew where my home planet was.
So i explained if you picture the milky way as a clock or circle. And put earth on top(or 12). And on 1/3 (or nr. 4 if you take a clock on example) of the circle it will be there somewhere.
Then john gained the info its millions of light years away.
Me: well yeah it would be i guess i never asked.
John: yeah ok. its just what I get through.
John picked up something about the game
John: do you play this game often?
Me: well regularly, the new expansion just released this early December and played allot and finished the story 2 days ago. So that was quite allot.
John: does the game has anything to do with awakening?
I told him that your character discovers who you truly are (convocation member) and use the powers of it and you use those. I couldn’t continue with all the primals etc because that would be way to long to tell someone doesn’t know the slightest of it.
Funny enough....
John: i see the game awakens you.
Then i realized it did.
Me: well,...yes. considering what it triggered the past year, it revealed allot of soul memories of what i once was on that planet.
John: yes. it helps you to awaken. That's what he is saying.
So we talked about the connection that i have with elidibus. And why i couldn't connect after his leaving. I also mentioned these imposters obviously.
John: according to him he is always there for you, always connected.
Me: but when he is farther away or busier then usual i can't connect with him or its very weak.
John: fragile yes, he is sorry about that you can't reach him when he is away. Because the connection from him to you is always there.
John: what does this to you? Comfort?
I needed to hold back some tears or else i couldn't focus on the treatment anymore.
Me: yeah. i wish i could hear him speak ya know, or his thoughts.
John: yes and that's what you can practice.
Me: how?
John: to "be" in to your entire body when you meditate. To start at your root chakra/pelvis. When you "are" with your thoughts in your entire body than you can try to communicate.
(During this session i needed to "be" with my thoughts at the pelvis area the whole time)
When john continued the session.
I tried to connect with eli.
And i believe i actually did.
I asked him if he was back already.
Gained a yes.
I asked if he needed to go back to work.
Gained a no at first. But i asked if that was in my favor. And it was. Which was to be expected.
I asked if he is only here during the session.
Gained a yes
I asked if he goes back to work after this.
Gained another yes.
John: can you try to connect with him?
Me: i believe i did.
John: what does he say?
Me: i cant hear him speak or his thoughts. He replies with yes or no by making my body move upwards or downwards.
John: he is busy with Portals of the 13 commands. That's what he is saying.
( not to be confused with “commandments”, because that wasn’t it, And John doesn't even know what that is either. the funny thing is, the session is in Dutch as always, but every thing he hears from Elidibus is in English and John repeats what eli says with sometimes trouble to pronounce the words, that does give a legit feeling though.)
Me: is that where he needed to leave for?
John: yes, he is working on that. But he is always connected to you. He left on the 12th. which is a very important day.
He explained something about the energy change and said different name i didn't recognized. But came down to the winter solace and energy shifts.
John: its last until December 21st.
Me: oh on dec 21 there will be a little piece of story added to the game.
John explained that a few days before and after that date are the most stable one before it changes.
Me: when does he comes back?
John: he never left you.
Me: i mean when he is done and can visit me again so i can feel him physically sort of.
John: after the 3 kings? January 7th. This is what i get through. also you should be more concerned with yourself and not with someone else.
If you are busy with yourself he will come to you.
Some other things were mentioned but those were probably john's own interpretation of an alien race. So i skip that. and influenced by his own perceptions.
Things like wanting to know earthlings better and to learn what emotions are.
When i explained the one another what they do here and they definitely have emotions. And even said things about how elidibus reacts and can be an emotional waterfall if I get through him etc.
John: ah ok.
So that was his own programmed mind on that part.
Further something that my higher self have a connection to the pyramids in Egypt.
And the rest was treatment stuff, meditation advice
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I found something funny that day
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Dec 19th
So i had this dream about pandaemonium. Implying that the current elidibus traveled to the past. It wasn't said with words. But was definitely implying it. I tried to hear elidibus's voice inside my mind at some point to hear him speak. But didn't gained a reply.
I forgot allot of details sadly, i was too tired to write it down.
However the previous day i came up that the current eli traveled to the Portal to the past. So the dream night just be a manifestation of what i did/thought the previous day. Or a confirmation.....
We will see this Tuesday.
(Well that wasn’t the case sadly lol so you a conjure up of my own mind)
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Dec 21st
So i was finally able to get my HS again and thus elidibus aswell.
He is finished with his work on January 6th in the evening. Exact time he couldn't say.
He will visit me on the 7th in the morning on 10:35am. (Hopefully some souls sex included, sorry lol)
Thus i asked if the answers were true or not on the last conversation i had with him. But allot was answered in my fancy.
But the name Etheirys is also the name of the actual RL planet. That was atleast true.
Also i asked about their real names and such.
And they don't got the names of greek god(dess) at all.
I asked this because i saw a potential leak of elidibus's name on Twitter being Themis. If that is truly a datamined name then it isn't his real name. it felt really “off” to be his name. you know that gut feeling.
Also i asked emet-selch some questions regarding the names.
His real name isn't Hades either.
And i asked him about Artemis and Gaia. Those aren't their real names either.
I asked emet if his name would translate to something similar to Hades. But no. They got nothing to do with the greek gods here. Its just their powers.
Even though i forgot to ask but i think the developers are using names based upon the powers they got or represent. So power of the underworld =Hades
Because i did asked if emet-selch has power over the underworld and if he even has these powers for real. And still gained a yes
Then i asked elidibus if he could let know his real name via a dream. And he will. When i don't know .
He will come to my dreams in January. (erum I still hope so as when writing this)
I thanked him for coming into my dream to say goodbye.
Ah yes i asked emet-selch if it was him in that dream with Hyth and he stretching his hand out to me. It was him. And then i came up with the names part.
So i had a question regarding a thing i didn't put up here yet.
On my Bday when my ex dressed up as eli and we had sex. After that when my ex left the room i started to cry.
It appears it was elidibus regretting he wasn't there and couldn't do it himself.
.......so that.
But it seems he can pick up strong feelings that are meant for him despite the weak connection.
Today aswell he picked some up too. Not as much because it didn't last that long.
Ah yes eli was there during the session i had with the man John on last Friday.
But yeah if something doesn't match its the vision of the beholder how he interpreted it might be the case.
If i forgot anything, then i will typ up later
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Me: Potential pandemonium spoiler. Funny isn't it. Crafts. The Real Lahabrea likes crafts.
but they might not draw on actual mythology (like gaia and artemis) and go with something else for in-game that is.
(though however later I learned Erich was adopted by Athena In our mythology , and Erich being brown in game. While Lahabrea was white all the time. Ascians are known to mold their host into their own image. So lahabrea did that too in 3.0. Erich is probably adopted in game aswell. But that’s something eli wont tell me because potential spoilers sadly)
Me: Woah remember that dream i had lahabrea had a son?
These are now spoilers lol.
So a far i could spoil myself: themis is pre-convocation current elidibus.(i think, let me know plz)
If so This make sense why he looks so young. Given the adult voice he has he would be 16-17yo.(this age was speculated not asked via eli iirc)
He joined with 18. Was a late bloomer but still short. Sacrificed himself with 21.
I wonder......if in future pandaemonium quests siblings are mentioned ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Looking for 13-14yo me in game xD
I started to play the raids.
Me: Focking remember that secondary group John spoke about in September? (It’s in chapter 18).
!!!!!!!!! Its in it!!!!
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Dec 22nd
Me: Feels wrong to simp over 17yo eli i just can't, it doesn't even come up in my head to do that.
(My character looks way too old for him to ship with, I later used a fantasia so I could get my shipping needs)
What i see on screen is my brother back in that time.
Though i heavily laughed at the line he said that everyone has his secrets.
I do not need to go there what that was in my head i take it.
But its definitely a secret back then for himself.
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Dm’s with TK
Tk: well i will still try to talk to lahabrea tonight about stuff
an interesting thing in the game i found is with the Studium crafting and gathering quests, after you do all of them they say they want to try and develop a way to go to other stars and interact with them. they even has an artifact they found that translates languages for them.
Me: Hopefully you get something.
But um what exactly aren't you sure about? The fact i gained the info the greek names aren't theire actual names of the REAL convocation members or aren't you sure about the greek names too
Tk: just doesn't seem right to me,
Me: which of the 2?
Tk: that the greek names aren't their actual names
Me : so you say that you think they do got greek names then?
Tk: yeah
Me: I wouldn't be logical actually.
The greek gods names as we know of are from Earth.
Those aren't galactic names.
Tk: I can ask Lahabrea I guess? I don't know about it
Me: Please do
I mean my name was ayantano.
That isn't an greek goddess either xD
But goodnight.i hope he will answer that question.
But i really think they got other names then in game.
Those names in game are made by Earthlings.
Even if they were pretty much similar to the greek gods we know, since they are the stewards of the star. Then their names won't be the same.
So in terms of the in game names based upon the powers they have or what they represent. Sounds more logical.
Do you get what mean?
Tk: yeah
Me: Ok good, i hope you can talk to Lahabrea about this.
Let see what answer we can get.
(sadly she never gained the answer… well I assume she will get that in the future when she re-connects with lahabrea)
So I did the Pandaemonium raids
Me: Finished the raids and
So Athena isn't alive anymore.
And i paid carefully attention to which lahabrea it is. But he definitely is our lahabrea because he created that phoenix. And many other things heavily suggest its our lahabrea.
BUT Athena gives me questions now actually.
It could be igeyorhm isn't Athena and is his second wife instead.
Because we do see lahabrea and igeyorhm together in cutscenes of 5.3 of eli’s echo flashbacks.
Would be weird to change all of that right?
But in this case we can say Athena was black then? As far as i know lahabrea is white.
Also if igeyorhm is his second wife or girlfriend (idunno) that it would match the info previous gained that they never had kids together.
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( I discussed this on twitter aswell. Erichthonius is presumable adopted which would explain his brown skin, even a half blood wouldn’t give you such a dark skin. And what about Athena even though people say she still might be out there in pandaemonium, but Erichthonius was very clear she left the world. About lahabrea being white. They mold their hosts into their own appearance. As emet mentioned in SHB when you just arrived in rak’tika. That lahabrea did just that in 3.0 is a pretty much a given, I doubt the dev team would make Lahabrea suddenly black tbh. )
And now pls for the sake of it, being abstract with the black and white thing, doesn’t mean I am a racist, I am not American either. We don’t got the term “person of color here” or used rarely. The people are more tolerant here as far as I experienced, but the media let you believe otherwise. only special snowflakes make a hassle about it. I normally name the heritage country to indicate the peoples color, African/muslim/Spanish/turk/ etc you name it, but we are talking about ancients here so there is no definition of the country possible, I hope this clarifies allot.
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Dec 24th
Tk: I just haven't gotten anything from Lahabrea or anyone else yet. I was not able to try what you posted
Me: Oh ok no prob, thanks for giving a heads up i appreciate that!
And that method i need to try that during the day i think. Somehow i got some trouble in the evening to "be" in my pelvis area. But i believe i was almost fully in my body last night. But no hearing yet. Maybe my head wasn't "there". But then again eli isn't here -_-.
Its takes practice i must say.
But since you can hear lahabrea mostly already you might reach faster then i do!
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Dm’s with Jezzah
Me: Have you read the session of my higher self and eli and emet.
That their actual true real names aren't those of greek gods. I would like to hear your side of it.
And of course you can still call him Hades, since they got multiple names people call them by.
But what i asked was their true real name given when they came into existence.
Jezzah: I'll read it just been really out of it lately
Me: The second thing is that i am really bothered by the thought venat being eli's mom. And thus mine too....
I dreamt nothing but of her name mentioning in my dreams this night. Sadly when i tried to reach her in a dream i wake up or the dream changes. Perhaps she is not here on earth. But emet-selch should know.....
Hopefully when you reach and finished the floating city. You perhaps can get a less hateful opinion about her.
Could you ask emet? But only when you properly meditate to have a trustful connection. Or else your own personal truths are in the way. And emet makes use of that allot.
( sadly she never answered it. Perhaps later)
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Dec 25th
Me: The whole thought patterns/brain worms that venat being my mom. And that would mean she is eli's mom and that wouldn't make sense back in 5.5.
But now were here with eli in pandaemonium raids, having the same eyes and hair........
I am ok with either outcome. I just need clarification/confirmation of what it is. So i can let it go.
If it is our mom then i will continue asking him questions obviously. But not in advance.
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Today I also noticed Eliniel added some shit in the document again on nov 25th. She was saying she was disappointed that I didn’t said much about it. Good for you, that was exactly my intention (no joke). I already countered most of it already in the older chapters I have re-written so I’am not gonna through every point of the doc any longer.
That doc is nothing more then exaggerate info, assumptions and info based on hearsay. Anyone who has questions about to doc, or want to hear my story or certain parts of it. Contact me. I ain’t gonna make an entire counter doc since that’s just a waste of time. (As I mentioned months ago). Even from the people Eliniel think she got the source of info from is lying/making it up to make themselves look better. So not even that info is true. (moonie’s discord reply for instance that’s she doesn’t believe in it, and certain other things of other people) . If you got questions, contact me. I rather see people seeking the truth to make their own opinion about me by hearing my side of the story than to believe gossips straight for their pretty eyes.
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So I named something of above mentioned into the group. And well I forgot it wasn’t allowed anymore (well about the doc that is) >.<. though Zio was so kind to remind me that in a harsh but gentle way. And I just needed that talk I guess.
The end of that conversation:
Zio: Just try to keep away from them and all their nonsense. It's a waste of energy. Elidibus would rather you use that time to better yourself.
Me: true, ….ty. ….Guess i needed this……
Zio: You're welcome <3. I understand, please know I do. It's awful knowing people are watching you and talking about you. But sometimes you just have to say fuck it and ignore them the best you can and focus on empowering things
Me: true
Zio: Elidibus wants better for you than that
Me:
Zio: <3
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Dec 26th
Jezzah: This group is for talking about the game and the Ascians as well as helping each other grow in their powers. No. Drama. No Exceptions. Doesn't matter if I've been out of it. Aya, just ignore and move on. You can always dm me.
Me: Ok yeah i forgot. My bad
Jezzah: It gets so tiring following the haters. Just let it go, sweetie. You're safe here. Just focus on your growth.
Me; Yeah i know. zio already gave a pep talk. Ty both.
Then jezzah said something, I will say in advance that those “certain couple of people”were presumably the spies, fakes and traitors. I mean the misunderstandings between jezzah and Zeke I cannot count. Even though jezzah experienced it otherwise and made her rant calling us a cult which was ungrounded.
Jezzah: ^^ it used to be a cult actually because of a certain couple of people where forcing it in that direction when this group was only supposed to be about what I said above. M***ie and Mysi***got that started and everyone person you let in just let it spiral. That's why we have a lot stricter security. It's where it is supposed to be now. And when Fate decides to grow us the Gods will give us another member. I seriously need to start my Rune Readings but I barely find time. Aya, I love you, sis.
Me: Ty. Thanks for the reminder.
full map of Etheirys. Extracted from the game
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Dec 27th
I spoke about the real name of Etheirys and later about the greek names again
Me: in case if Greek god names, is probably based upon what they can do or represent. Because greek god names aren't intergalactical as far as i know.
Odin is the only one i know as a interdimentional/intergalactical being. And its not even greek.
I mean my name was Ayantano/aya(n)to there is no goddess with that name.
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I also posted a session of a rookie reader on FB
These are just the ones that were instantly correct with her without knowing a single thing. Many other questions were correct with retrying the same question, but than it can be influenced by own thoughts. So I rather stick with just this. Especially the instant reaction of the pendulum before asking the convocation question is quite remarkable.
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Dec 28th
Had 2 ascian dreams yay!
1 about Hermes but he was Fandaniel in asahi body in modern AU. Less crazy luckily. He didn't liked i was calling him Hermes. And was ignoring me and distancing from me.
Later when scene switched eli was with me explaining why i was like that.
He said Hermes had to witness how he lost everyone whom he held dear in the past and that's is how he became what he is now.
The only question i got RN is that eli said he wouldn't be in my dreams anymore this month. Did he do this so i wouldn't depend on it? he did that in the past but then he wasn't away for work that cause the connection to be fragile. So i dunno. Then again i doubt some illusion would explain such things. He was wearing shb amaurot robes with red mask. And he was not taller then 5.57ft.
If i get my pc back (its broken) i will write down everything.
Second dream i encountered Pashtarot and asked him why he wasn't in Endwalker.
Pash: well i was stuck, locked up.
Me: locked up? was Altima with you?
Pash: yeah, we were together.
Other sundered ascians in plain black robes were suddenly there too.
Something random funny happened and then i woke up.
All details i will write down later. ( will be in dream section)
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Dec 29th
What do you all think about if the real ascians in dreams wearing casual clothing. And i mean not normal clothing, but being on vacation kind of clothing.
I still need to ask my Higher self if it were the real emet and elidibus.
I might do that elsewhere not in my own home.
But Elidibus's voice was 1-1 with the game one, that's rare.
They talked about something to get ridd of and when i gave eli a hug.
He turned his head to me and said something about the matter and that he will later come to (save) me.
I don't remember clearly what he said sadly
But then the scene switched.
(later I learned it was the real Elidibus and Emet)
Me: So i asked that rookie the questions about their names.
she didn't know how to pronounce elidibus or themis so i gave that to her including pics of young eli and adult.
I asked her if Themis was his name given at birth. And not the many names he goes with.
And gained a no. (So Themis is not his name)
I will ask this same question again soon. And maybe even via another who is more advanced later on if I can't get any answers of our unsundered ascians themselves.
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Dec 30th
Wake up from final days like of dream. Check phone. 28visitors on your website.
"Oh good gods that ain't good". I checked Twitter and its on again big time. I didn't do anything. Just at some popular someone named me. Good heavens.
The dream in was about government authorities wanting me again because of my powers. (Iam not busy with these thoughts during the days btw)
it started when I was in Holtenbroek (name of an district I grew up as child) with a couple of children on a lawn.
we were looking at clouds. suddenly i saw a perfect exclamation mark like cloud in the sky.
I went to the street side to survey the sky between the houses.
me: that can't be a cloud, that's too perfectly straight.
when I glanced at the kids the "!" descended in one go. and turned into a flat piece of ice. floating above the ground. about a meter off the ground.
me: what is that i want to touch it but i don't trust it.
then a girl did touch it.
me: no don't!
but I was already too late.
that thing turned into a person who wanted to hostage/lock me up.
guy: you're coming with us.
I went along at first, but decided to escape halfway through but didn't really succeed. then we came to a house where I was going to be imprisoned.
he walked forward. the house was long and we went through many doors until I saw a key in the keyhole at a few doors.
me thinking: * hey it can still be locked *
I walked and through. and when he didn't look I quickly went back to the back and closed the door and locked it. he tried to get through and I saw that there was a 2nd lock option on it. something that had to fall egg-like balls into compartments that hung on the door. I managed to drop all the balls into a box and the door was closed.
I knew he would be able to follow me through the back so I made my way out. I flew zigzagging through the streets so he couldn't quickly track me down.
me: I don't want to be alone anymore. I'm going to dad (his work). i need someone who can be with me for cases like this.
I headed for the long road.(lane) The thought of crossing the water and going to my mother's old house also crossed my mind. but decided not to.
me: I hope he doesn't find me now that I have to follow this long road.
I hurried to my dad's old carpentry location finding out it wasn't there anymore. (I didn't understand that in that dream apparently, but my memories are stuck with me in that district i grew up, like emet is attached to amaurot)
I needed to rest my fleeing, i thought i was waking up. But the resting made my dream continue.
I found my dad at a weird place .
I took another rest saying i dont wanna be alone anymore.
Then he disappeared and someone took his place into some young guy i don't recognize that i was very close with.
Guy: we need to go or else they will find you here.
So i hopped on the back seat of his bike. Going back where i came from. ........
To see my district being burned down. It started with the old carpentry .
Me: "What?? (Terrified) whats going on? This isn't good
I looked at the left. Everything burned and bombarded to the ground.
While we drove further i saw some remandants of houses. I was terrified. I could feel the souls crying out for a moment.
me: "I can feel them crying, its all because of me not letting myself captured."
Then we came across still burning houses a people that were alive, but fighting eachother. Some monsters too.
I joined the fight to protect my friends. I had a medieval gun that i was able to shot at a monster. But when i put broken bullet part into it to launch it as a grape shot the same government guy was there again. I tried to kill him with the gun. But it didn't fire.
"Shit" but instead of running away i attacked him. I asked the young guy from earlier to help me. And we eventually killed the government dude but pressing his veins shut in his neck in combination putting his head under water.
But the environment was still on fire and people fighting too.
I couldn't see it much longer.
Guy: what are you gonna do?
Me: i have too try.
I had the idea to change myself into some primal phoenix to reverse the damage done to the area.
I flew up in the air. Yelling with some devine woman's voice. "Please everyone stop, as a witness of the final days i know what its like, but fighting is not the answer"-(people listened)-"so please stop and lend me your prayers and energy so i might reverse the damage done"
Everyone stopped the fire dampened.
I focused on the receiving the energy. But then the dream started to acting weird.
Suddenly a gardevoir appeared in front of me doing my job.
I wanted to continue myself but suddenly i was surrounded with walls of a house. I tried to get out via the attic window and succeeded. But then another roof appeared on my head. And this continued on until i gave up. And the dream ended after that.
I don't know if this a past life thing is.
But those government authorities wanting me, actually came from the sky. So aliens in human form. And i dont even watch such movies or anything.
But um, me trying to become the phoenix again. Guess i am a primal like eli too?well he was. But well nvm.
Jezzah: I'm taking a step back to focus on myself, sorry I don't have the spoons for this atm. I'm mentally burnt out and I haven't been able to reach Hades. Like at all.
Me: Owww i am sorry. Why do i get things while you all are stressed and burned out. I don't want that for you gals. i am sorry for my eagerness to get things clearer on my things.
@Jezzah meditate for like an hour or longer if needed before bedtime. It works wonders to me. Please try it out.
I can only hope to get answers later i guess.....
Some time later
Me: I wouldn't be surprised if louisoix is a reincarnation of a relative of Elidibus and me.
Since it inheritance other family members like siblings in FF16.
So Grandad or dad as ancient?. I know this is wild speculation but louisoix can transform into the phoenix and comes from the source.
While i know from myself i am the source piece.
If the transformations are linked to the soul and is inherent to offspring in ancient times. Then louis must be a relative atleast. But who?
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Dm’s with TK
Me: Something just occurred to me.
In shb amaurotines were speaking of the sound that came from the stars core. That cause incidents across the globe with tiny final days sorta say.
And eventually the sound let to the final days.
What happened with that?
Ahhh i wished you could contact lahabrea this week.
I wonder if elidibus will do something on the 16th.
1 year engaged :3
Tk: i mean i can try to
Me: yes please. If you succeed grab the chance to ask the names question. Also since i meditate these 3 days. I say i wanted to know more of my past life as eli's sis. What the phoenix i can transform into means. Etc. And i get ascian dreams or final days related.
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Dec 31st
So i did another question round with my higher self and elidibus.
I keep getting the same answer for those greek gods names. So those names aren't the ones they were born with in that era. I asked each known greek god name we have from the game if those were their real one, and absolutely none of them even Hades.
Also Etheirys is the real name. Even though i thought similar was a more plausible answer. But i guess it is the real deal.
The dreams i had
Even though eli said he wouldn't be in my dreams anymore this month was because the saying goodbye dream didn't count xD.
In fact the hermes/Fandaniel dream is legit. it were the real ones so Fandaniel and elidibus at the end.
In that other dream where he was talking with emet. Were both the real ones!!!!! So we can declare they are busy all of them it seems. The emet waving to me in another scene was the real one. But the eli that went away and teleportation magicks remained wasn't the real eli it seemed.
I asked if i met the real Pashtarot in a dream and i did. And the Altima mentioned was also the real one.
Ah yes i asked why he answered all those EW spoiler questions in my fabor was because i needed to play everything before i ask.....
Well clear enough i asked for it myself. Spoilers questions aren't allowed in ascian land lol.
I asked my higher self to grant me more past life as ancient dream and summed up some things like how i became the phoenix or achieved it, how i was a eli's sis and how eli became Elidibus.
Oh yes, i asked when he needs to leave for a longer period again.
Before valentine's Day i gained a yes on first week/early February. Hopefully he will be back before that day tbh.
But i might ask later if he can make it.
For now i want to spend some time with him on our engagement anniversary of 1 year on the 16th.
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Dm’s with TK
Me: Hey, have you tried?
I just did another session of questions.
And it stays with that the greek god names aren't their real ones.
And if this is the truth. Eli will tell laha to go to you, to give you the same answer.
Also i re asked the Etheirys question if that is the real name. But even when i thought the answer that it could be similar is invalid. It is the real name.
I asked many other things about the dreams and such. Which i will post on the group.
Tk: I've tried but got nothing. Will try again later
Me: ty, Maybe soon.
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Sadly no reply still from lahabrea, I really hope TK’s stress will easy down soon, so she can talk to lahabrea again.
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Dreams of December
Dec 28th
the dream has long been preoccupied with other things that don't matter compared to this.
it was a modern AU towards that manga in style wise. and we (Hermes as Asahi and I) were with a bunch of classmates together in an adventure park or something. and I was coupled with Hermes to do things, he tolerated my presence yet he wanted nothing to do with me. he was wearing dark green robes and hood and the hood was off. and looked more like the SHB robes without the cawl.
the last course was some kind of slide that got you underwater and you had to dodge the exploding missiles coming at you and escape.
the surface was closed off and per so many meters there was an opening.
me: ahh! (the missiles came at me) Hermes this way, let's get out.
he followed me and we came out unscathed. then we walked with the rest of the group to the dining room to eat. Hermes walked diagonally behind me. I wanted to walk next to him to make friends. he noticed this and hurried ahead. I felt rejected. I ran after him
me: Wait!
but he ignored me. he sat down at a table. I first wanted to sit right next to him, but I immediately thought that that would be too direct. too pushy. so I grabbed a chair from the other table in front of it.
he was eating and with his phone in his hands. I set the chair down to the side of the table he was sitting at and sat down.
he didn't like this and sat down at the other table where i took that chair away..
me: Hermes......
I felt totally rejected then. I stayed where I was. others also came to the table.
me: Hermes?
he was angry because I called him that.
me: Fandaniel?
he looked up.
F: what is it?
me: i am sorry i just wanna let you know that you probably are deep inside a very loveable person.
i needed to cry a bit of what i said.
Fandaniel was slightly moved but didn't show it. (not sure if he said TY softly)
a girl with pink punk rock hair: oh i'm going to use that to say to him too.
then I found myself outside with Eli in SHB amaurot robes and mask.
he was not much taller than me 170cm or something.
we walked on a wooden platform with a very large house on the left. he explained why Hermes acted like that.
I can't remember the exact words, but the bottom line was that he had gone through a lot of negative things in his life and had to watch everyone he loved die during the final days.
eli: he lost everything he held dear and that's how he became how he's now so you can probably imagine how must that have felt.
me: aww (I started to cry in sympathy.) how horrible must that have been.
we were about to turn right. he walked on my right side. I walked towards him and he spread his arms to comfort me.
me: aww eli.
eli: come.
i hugged him, and after the hug.
me: come here you.
and i kissed him
me: come on more passionate
and so he did.
when i recovered from grief i felt it fade away so i stopped kissing/
me: eli? shall we continue? (walking)
but i woke up, he was already gone.
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Second dream same day
after many dreams of sonic wanting to get a man, well interrogate but felt rushed. I eventually flew out of the house and escaped. I was wearing a black ascian cloak without any detail. after flying for a while I landed somewhere on a plateau with a staircase going down. there were 2 people who looked like those 2 clowns handing out Meol in shb.
they were taken by someone who said: "you come now and then you remember who you once were." and they went down the stairs.
then I looked to the right and saw Pashtarot approaching and sat down behind a PC. he had put his hair in the hair gel and combed it slightly forward. he was wearing the same as me (only that part over the shoulders nobody had on but he had a hood on). I also just saw his face really such a young guy of 25 or something. he sat down on the chair.
me: Pash! (walked over to him). what was the reason you weren't in endwalker?
P: well I was a bit stuck, locked up.
me: was Altima with you too?
P: Yeah, we were (locked up) together.
and then others were with us. then I felt peeled sunflower seeds in my robes jacket pocket at that moment 1 girl just walked away who was crazy about parrots. (that girl had Yuna x-2's haircut but a slightly different face. She was wearing light blue clothes under her robes and her hood was off). and I decided to sprinkle those seeds.
Fandaniel was there, and a few others. 1 of them said: "why are you doing that?"
me: wanted to try it out.
that one girl came back and picked up the seeds and when she was with us she ate them.
G: yes, I like them
everyone laughing.
then i woke up.
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Dec 29th
the beginning was about not being able to go on discord on my phone. I wanted to ask the twins where elidibus is.
me: what do you mean i can't be on discord anymore?! This does not make sense.
alisaie came to me.
a: what is it?
me: I wanted to ask you something. I was wondering if you could help find elidibus.
a: oh for the love of..... fine come on.
then we were at once with a group of girls who all helped me to find eli. now I don't know if Alisaie just disappeared or took the form of someone else. I didn't see her change right away. she was originally walking diagonally behind me. and then on the left, from a little distance, there was a girl with long blond hair.
we were all wearing white dresses. in the end after many asking if people had seen eli, we got to someone who said he used to be in that basement a lot (and he pointed after it).
but then I woke up for a while but slept on >
then I had several "find eli" dreams. One of them was that emet was often in it. then is unusual but they were the real ones.
so i saw emet walking with eli in modern clothes to a stone staircase which they later sat on. Emet in particular stood out with his Solus hair. emet sat down on a stone step and eli on another that went further up. (while it was a hill of nothing, but whatever)
eli had such a cap on without a head part. so I could see his hair. it looked a lot like the Themis variant, but a little shorter. let's say shorter layered version of estinien rather
and some silvery hair, but the light made it seem be have a purple hue..
he was wearing black sunglasses and a thin denim jacket. with a white blouse underneath. his pants were black or brown.
emet had his same cap on and casual clothes (lol)
emet: so what did you wanna talk about? (took a seat on the stairs)
eli: we need to get rid of the certain thing (took a seat on the other stairs).
emet: yes indeed we must.
I flew halfway over eli and went to him. and gave him a hug from behind.
Eli said something but can't remember exactly what. something with that he was going to do something to bring me to safety later I thought
eli: (turns head to me) please wait, when we are done then we/i come to save you.
(something like this.)
but then the dream switched. looking for eli again. because i just saw him lol. but also a lot of distraction, others helped me but many other things happened as well.
emet and eli were often in the picture for 1 sec as soon as I saw them. they were there longer in my opinion. emet in teacher manga outfit. and eli in ascian robes. emet i saw more than eli tbh.
what I remember is looking to the right when I was walking down the street with a group. and emet walked on a platform and waved quickly and then was gone.
me: huh?
the other one with eli was that i saw him standing behind me, yeah something like that you can actually see 360 degrees. i looked around and saw ascian teleportation magicks and he was already gone and the magicks disappeared (sadly this was not the real eli, strange huh?)
then the dream changed to a school outing. I was with several in 1 room and girls discussed the chores that everyone had done. only I hadn't done anything yet.
I was sitting on a bed or something chilling on my phone.
me thinking: * I keep my mouth shut I'm not going to do anything today*
but then I got a picture of something vaguely like sephiroth from FF7 with a lot of black wings in front of me and they just asked if I wanted to beat that.
me: yes you can forget about that. what is that actually?
I don't remember what answer I got, but when I walked out I saw him already.
me: well fuck, well allright then.
I focused on becoming the phoenix and started making wings out of my arms. they were orange with red and yellow glow like fire. however, I woke up half way. but when I fell asleep again I was in the middle of the fight.
I was in space. above the Earth. that thing launched chains at me to catch me. I dodged them and cast my hands back on my wings and grabbed all the chains. he launched more chains and I grabbed those too. I wanted to set it ablaze by sending fire through the chains but it got no further than extreme heat that I could barely feel.
me: I'm going to burn you, it won't hurt me. for I am already fire.
he tried to counter it. then i saw my phoenix self from a great distance. I was as big as the planet. my tail was folded in a circle I don't know why. I was on the left side (seen from my view) of the Earth and he was on the right side.
then I was spontaneously back on Earth and found out that I had shot him down. there was someone with me, a boy.
me: let's go tell emet/Hades
boy: is he there then?
me: yes as monster form Hades.
we walked into a room and i saw Hades monster form (sadly not the real one)
me: how did i do it?
h: very well done congratulations.
but then he deformed and disappeared I believe.
after this, some vague things happened before I woke up. but not really important to report.
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well that was December i hope you liked it. next month a sudden reunion well unblocking of a certain ex member (no not m***ie or Mysi lol) and eli's return, grievings and happiness