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My Ascian Journey - Chapter 24: Developing powers and the name of our son ( March & April 2022)

In this chapter, there is someone who contacted me through my weblog. But I am not entirely sure about that person. And the entire chat I had with this person is discussed via Dm’s mostly, even with zeke. More on that later and my conclusion.

Further I came to know the name of our son (from eli and me), the whole reason I didn’t wrote this chapter sooner is that I wanted to keep the name a bit longer for myself. But Elidibus seems fine about it to share it online in my story. Yet I waited until May to continue writing with the name included.

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March 1st

This is so funny lately. My ex can't seem to lit the gas stove. Everytime the fire goes out.

And when i do it, it stay burning.

Just now it happened again. But i kept sitting on my ass at the dinner table.

Ex: it happened again.

Me: try again.

And when he lit the fire i snapped my fingers and it stayed burning lol

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This is also the month I started to ask for the rest of his agenda. For the dates he would come over for a visit. Even if it was just for a few hours or the entire day. Sometimes he didn’t showed up. But still the majority of the dates received he came over. These dates are asked throughout the month and April which I will add to this chapter aswell. I see I didn’t always noted when he left. The time he will arrive on a certain date is asked on previous visitations so earlier dates up until 1,5 month in advance (this includes other questions asked along with it aswell). so those time frames are indications. It rarely happens he comes on the said time lol XD usually later with a max of 30min, if he is not there then he wont come.

March 3rd 10:45 a few hours until 13:29

March 10th 10:34 a few hours till 13:35

March 13th 10:44, left at 14:00

March 15th 10:16 few hours till 14:30

March 19th, the entire day until I go to sleep. Arrive at: 9:39am, but didn’t came over. Why? My energies were deprived, I had after my throat infection a severe lack of sleep. I wasn’t able to notice him even if he would come over. I made an appointment with john to check upon my energies, elidibus and our son.


March 22nd, few hours 10:34, not certain if he came over, I still had sleeping problems that severe I didn’t slept at all anymore.

March 25th, 10:11

March 25th was preparation day of dutch comic con, but I was too busy to notice him so he skipped.

March 28th . Few hours. 10;44, I was to exhausted from the convention and was fast asleep when he arrived. I asked my spiritquide Linala if he visited. He did but didn’t stayed.

March 31st . Few hours. 10:37, he didn’t came over. I had people over who were repairing our bathroom window. I tried by going to the bedroom to check. but he didn’t came over.

April 3rd, few hours at 11:19. Will leave at 16:34 (firstly it was 16:16 but when i asked again because i forgot it became 16:34 because he wanted to stay longer.

April 7th, the entire day, 10:17

April 10th, 10:39 left at 14:19

April 20th entire day 11:14, didn’t came over. I was busy preparing for another convention.

No visitation during Elfia he said it would be too crowed to focus upon him, less crowded then DCC but very crowded for Elfia. ( which happened to be true!)

April 27th entire day, arrive at 10:54,

April 30th few hours at 10:24 didn’t come over, he was there already during the session with John the previous day.

The rest is for further chapters.

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March 3rd

Short chat with my faithful reader Fabs

I asked him if he finished the lasted chapter> some time later:

Fabs: Now i have finished it.

Me: nice, did you liked it?

Fabs: Yeah it was good, did you ever find the cause for the headaches you had then thinking of venat or did they fade away.

Me: i think those only happen when she seeks to contact me (as krile had in EW. you will see that when you get there). last month (feb) i was mostly getting randomly emotional when i heard her voice in whatever cutscene it was.

Fabs: Ah yeah

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Dm’s with zeke

(I thought elidibus didn’t came over that day, but he was just very late)

Me: Sigh eli being workaholic again. He said he would come today, but he didn't.

Zeke: I'm sorry.

Me: thanks for your compassion

I guess you didn't picked up anything either? Even in a dream? If he shares anything with you about anything. Please tell. I know you are so used to it that you receive info from him. But i would like to know what he has to share.

Zeke: I have had a lot of thoughts about a burning Chinese style palace, whatever that might mean

Me: Were those from him of or own past life memories? Could be symbolic too i guess. Somehow this read like as "inner conflict" at first glance because of the fire. If you got more of these kinda things please share. Did elidibus shared any info regarding the live letter?

Mainly if those face glyphs are truly magic limiters for preventing to burn through their own soul? .

Because i gained a big fat "no" to that.

Zeke: no

Me: Oh too bad

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March 6th

Idk where this coin is from. i found it underneath a blanket upon the washing machine, that i had to tidy up so the repairman can check what's wrong. And i found it after a light blond girl at the door was asking for candy. Idk who that was and why. Don't got candy



That was weird man I didn't recognized the girl either or from who it was. We have several small blond girls in the street. And why does it have Venat’s pet dog name on it????

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March 8th

Suddenly communication with elidibus before getting out of bed to make my son ready for school. I gain the connection when my GMV as alarm was playing. And imagined the text he says in the song he was actually saying it. Somehow it triggered a connection.

We had soul sex, very good one actually. Asked if he comes over on Thursday. And gained a big fat yes.

When the last alarm (endwalker footfalls) ended he stayed for a few more minutes and then left.

I had him for like 20min, and i appreciated it allot.

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March 10th

this person that contacted through my weblog in the middle of the night.

Since this person didn’t signed up on my weblog so I cant send them a message with a notification email that I replied, so for now I will put almost everything of the chat in it since I don’t think there is much sensitive info shared, (s)he kept allot to her/himself . Some useful practices were mentioned that shouldn’t remain private for newbies, its nothing extraordinary or high advanced stuff imo.

She ( I think it’s a she, if it is otherwise I will change it) started with this.

“The world will soon be plunged into chaos, and dynamis will overwhelm those who are not prepared for the coming conflict. You are ready for the skills that I will now share. Find somewhere comfortable. Quiet. This can be a chair, your bed, or your washroom. Somewhere where you will not be interrupted. Close your eyes, and be mindful of your spine. This is the conduit to which your aether travels about your body, and the root of it all is sits just in front of the base of your spine in the shape of a small, yet dense sphere. A cord of concentrated aether extends from this sphere, and it is supposed to connect to the center of this Star. Many have lost this connection, and need to focus to maintain it. Now then, create this cord from the root of your aether, and allow gravity to pull it downward. When you tether yourself to this Star, you release stagnant aether into the Lifestream, where it is cleansed and returned whence it came. It is a virtuous cycle. Now then, notice where you are. Take a deep breath. Notice the distance between your location and the floor. Now notice the distance between the floor and the soil below. Breathe. Now notice the distance between the soil and the water table underneath. Notice the distance between the water table and the rocky mantle. Notice the distance between the mantle and the molten core below that. Deep breath. Notice the distance between the molten core and the center of the Star. That ball of light at the very center of the Star is where you connect your grounding cord. Deep breath. Give your regards to the heart of the Star. Do you hear a response? Notice the color and texture of your grounding cord. It may look like a line of energy, or look like something physical; a rope, a wire, a pipe, a tree trunk. Adjust it as needed to be in affinity with your body. Gravity will assist in your cleansing, and by this step you've already released some aether from your corporeal and aetheric body. Now it is time to fill in the space that was created with life-giving aether. Create a gold sun over your head. Have it call back aether and dynamis alike from wherever you left it throughout your day and week. Work. School. Online meetings. Video games. Your fantasies about your future. Your regrets about your past. Wherever you've placed your attention. Just watch the energies return and see if you notice where it came from. Have the sun burn up and neutralize your energy. Then bring the sun into the top of your head. It will automatically flow into the spaces you created. Create as many of these suns as necessary until you feel as if your aether pool has reached its capacity. Open your eyes, bend over and touch the floor, draining any tension from the back of your neck, then stand up, and stretch. Now that you are grounded, it is time to focus on the aetheric barrier that surrounds your form. Close your eyes, and imagine yourself surrounded by light. At first, a thin layer will suffice, however eventually you should expand this field to no more than the tips of your fingers were you to extend your arm. There are several types of barriers you can create. Some reflect dynamis back at the source. Some simply keep you protected from aether of attacks. Experiment and decide what sort of protection will serve you in the coming days. I wish you all the best.”

Me: Thanks that energy light shield works. I have been using that since January. But the grounding advice is very welcome. Though i got a hard time seeing things. Or is "knowing" its there enough?

Chat

Also is there a way to connect with Etheirys?

Chat

And what do you know more about Earth's chaos. Can you tell more?


She replied not sooner then near 4pm (my time). Elidibus was over that morning but I didn’t ask about it yet, because he wasn’t mentioned yet.

However

Her reply: I’m full glad to know that it’s been working for you. If you’re skilled in the shield, you’re ready for the next step in its utilization. Extend your arm. At the end of your arm, imagine an Elpis flower. Keep this flower between yourself and any entities nearby. You can create as many flowers as you need. This will protect your energy, as the flowers will absorb any dynamis directed at you. You can use a rose if you need protection against aether, as well.

As far as visualization goes, you do it need to see with your mind’s eye. Knowing it’s there is enough. You can also train your body to feel that it’s there as well, if you so desire to go that route.

There is a way to connect with Etheirys. It’s not much different than the traditional grounding method, however you will wish to envision your astral body traveling to Etheirys, and then imagining your aether connecting to that Star from there. It’s all about intent. If you wish to connect with Etheirys, you can make it so.

As far as Earth’s situation goes, I can only see possible futures—the most likely of futures. One of them results in World War III, though one doesn’t need to be gifted in the arcane to notice as much.

***As far as visualization goes, you don’t need to see with your mind’s eye.

In every timeline, however, there will be a swell in dynamis that can be felt by all. It’s prudent to protect yourself from these overwhelming energies.


Me: Ty for your advice i will practice with it definitely! Though dynamis would have a different effect here than on Etheirys. I mean people won't change/morph into abominations here. So how does it work here?

Chat

Chat

Also, if i may ask. Do you got any connections with people or entities of Etheirys? If so which one?

Chat

another question about dynamis here. what is it usually called? what do other gifted people call this energy? i know aether on Etheirys is pretty much the same here and often called/pronounced the same. but what would dynamis be?


She: That’s correct, dynamis will not warp the physical forms of the entities that reside here. However that does not make the power any less terrifying. You have lived upon this Star for many years. You’re aware of what emotions are capable of. They can turn the most mild-mannered of individuals into murderers, and so forth.

I am an Etheirys native, though my name is of no consequence compared to the knowledge I wish to gift upon you.


Me: of no consequence?


She: Dynamis is called different things by different religions. Generally when someone calls themself an empath or highly sensitive person, it means they are sensitive to dynamis. And that is correct, I’m simply a friend. :)


Me: ah yes ofcourse, the power to feel energies

Chat

i guess?

Chat

who were you on Etheirys? are from pre-sundering like i am? or post sundering?


She: Indeed. Everyone has intuition, and everyone can sense dynamis, it simply varies based upon an individual’s sensitivity.

Pre-sundering. Though I keep very much to myself. Mayhap I could speak on myself at another juncture.


Me: oh ok, well i would love to know who you were. and how you came to know you are from Etheirys

Chat

though, how did you find me actually? through all the discouse on twitter? or my previous ao3 perhaps? or just this webblog?

She: When one takes corporeal form, one is subject to forgetfulness, unfortunately. It is the natural order of things, though some retain memories. Those who are meant to share their past knowledge. I’ve retained more knowledge than many, and for that I am thankful.


Me: are you also able to communicate with the convocation?


She: I’ve been watching you for a time across different platforms, waiting until you reached sufficient enlightenment for me to bequeath my knowledge unto you.


Me: oh interesting


She: I am, though I keep much to myself.


Me: also elidibus?

Chat

some people talk with only 1 member maybe 2. that why i ask


she: Ah. I speak with whoever I need to, whenever the need arises though it’s infrequent. I’m self-sufficient, and I very much do things on my own.


Me: did you ever had a chat with elidibus?


She: If you’re curious as to who I am, you could utilize divination. I will not block your readings.

I have.


(with that reply I already had an idea this person would come up with “elidibus” himself)


Me: i never did divination though.

Chat

and um are you willing to tell what you were talking about? i am sure he would'nt mind


she: I would be honored to teach you, or at the very least guide you in the direction to start doing so. While he would not mind my divulging our conversation, of course, I would take this as a learning opportunity.


Me: oh well, what i truly desire is to hear him actually speak. i want to hear his voice.


She: Tarot is accurate as long as you beseech the universe to offer succor. Of course, a willing participant is never amiss.

I see. And I certainly understand your desires.


( I have my sincerely doubts on tarot tbh, its not always accurate. Moonie was very good at it because she combined it with automatic writing, which was sure she talked with 1 of the unsundered,)

Me: i tried tarot but it didn't stick with me.

Chat

did you read every chapter i have written?


She: I see. There are other forms of divination, as well. Some much prefer runes, though I’ve yet to find any stones who sing to me as it were. Oracle cards provide a more complete story and you may find them more compelling.

Not every chapter. A great few, however.


Me: did elidibus ever said anything to you about me?


She: Unfortunately I’m often pulled in one direction or another, and don’t often have time for myself. He has. It was his desire for me to help you when you were ready. And I intend to do just that.

However, simply giving you answers won’t assist with your growth. As such, you must needs hone your intuition, and divination will help you accomplish said task.

Ground yourself before employing divination devices. If you still own tarot cards, mayhap they will react better to you now.


Me: yeah i still got them yes, though i know hardly the meanings of every card. still using the plain manual for explanations


She: Ah. That’s understandable. You will first need to get to know your cards and establish a relationship with them. Shuffle the deck, and pull a card. Truly look at it, and sense what the card is trying to tell you. Then, cross-reference your intuition with the manual.

You only need to learn a card or two a day. When you’re more comfortable, or mayhap when you have some time to yourself, you can play solitaire with the deck, all whilst focusing on each card.


Me: though do you got any teachings for me regarding to hear elidibus's voice


She: I do, yes. You must make yourself comfortable with hearing a voice inside your mind if you haven’t done so already. It’s possible to hear external voices, however that’s subject to trickery by lesser entities.

It will not be his voice at first, however if you close your eyes… try to hear something said by him. It can be anything you wish.

Essentially you must open yourself to such interactions. Doing so while in a state of rest or meditation is most effective.


Me: yes i am aware of the trickery but that's with every method sadly. i only recently got rid of the imposters that were imitating elidibus by feelings.


She: That is very true. Which is why you must develop your self first. So that you’re stronger than any entity that may wish you harm. And when you make a wish, or a prayer, you must always ask for the greatest good to be delivered unto you. That you seek help from only benevolent entities.


Me: though iam not unfamiliar with voices in my mind. as i swear i hear Venat once


She: That is certainly a step in the right direction, then. Keep improving yourself. Allow your mind to be open, but not so open that malevolent entities take advantage of you.


Me: yeah ok, though those instances happen randomly i got no control over it


She: You never will have control. Entities have a free will of their own. You can request their assistance, or their audience, however they may refuse for one reason or another.

There is a relationship that must needs be built. A trust established. And of course, your essence must be resolved to receive.


(yeah the receiving thing is an issue here, it is lesser now, but when Venat tried to contact me I surely noticed the lack of my receiving abilities, and I still don’t know how to properly improve on that)


Me: well i don;t think the relation of my elidibus and me is the problem lol. but i rather think i am not able to received his word yet


She: For now, my suggestion to you is to focus on grounding and shielding. Divination if you have the time and the focus. Then, I would begin learning cleansing and warding rituals to ensure that you are safe.

For his words, I would focus on improving your own capabilities so that you can attune yourself to his voice.


( I must say its good to read this again while writing this chapter)

Me: yes that

Chat

but how, how do i improve it? i can;t seem to find anyone who can properly teach me this.


she: You may wish to look into Reiki. I do not practice Reiki, I have my own methods of healing and utilizing magicks that are… eccentric at best.

Given Earth and Etheirys do not operate the same, I’ve been doing my best to adapt methods of the latter to my current existence.


(funny she isn’t the first one mentioning Reiki to me lol, maybe when I am older, I already got a decent running webstore, got no time to learn extra things atm)

Me: what were you able to do as an ancient?


She: I am aware there are Reiki classes that span the Star, so you shouldn’t have much issue finding a teacher.

A bit of everything, I suppose. My skills in divination appear unchanged, however I require more tools for the craft. My healing skills are decidedly weaker here though there’s less aether to channel, and it’s been a struggle to adapt to using the land and not my own font.

As I said, full glad am I to discuss myself once you’ve acquainted yourself with divination. :)


Me: ya know. if i would tell the other about this. i know Zio will say probably "if this person can’t tell who they were, its possibly a troll" and yes well i have been fooled before in such a way. so that why i asked who you were.


She: I’m no troll. Though as you’ve admitted, you’ve been fooled in the past. You do not trust yourself, relying on the words of others for good or for ill. Hence why I wish for you to see the truth for yourself with eyes unclouded. However, if you must know who I am, I am Elidibus. With this claim alone I know you will not trust my words, given your own biases. Your own pretenses. Which is why I wish for you to see your own truth. Do that for me, and whether or not you believe my claims matters little to me. Only that you grow into the person I know you can be.


Me: he may speak through you like with Zeke, but you can't acually be him. he is is own person without a host.


She: I am using a body that is not my own to speak, that is correct. As I said, my indentity is of little consequence.


Me: ok can i ask some test questions that i know the answer from to check if it's correct


She: I have come to share the knowledge I have acquired from this world—naught more, and naught less.

You may

Me: well then. so um when was our child born, or let say came into existence, since its a soul only.


She: Given the nature of existence, a soul always exists. It’s simply an instrument to drive a body, controlled if you will by its higher self, and eventually the Source. Though if you’re asking when said entity was assigned to be ours, that is not a question I have the ability to answer.


Me: its a new born soul


She: Even if it appears as such it’s a great deal more complex than that. Either way, there is only so much knowledge I can retain in a corporeal vessel without consulting my higher self or akashic records.

To which you have my apologies.


Me: well if elidibus way typing a few comments back. he would have answered the date he told me

She: I’ve brought the requisite knowledge that I wished to share with you. Naught more, and naught less. As I said, who I am is of little consequence, and I do not require your belief for me to share my knowledge with you. With that said, keep with your grounding exercises and beseech the aid of a Reiki healer. When you find yourself more enlightened, I shall return to gift you with my wisdom. Do take care of yourself, Ayane.

Me: can i ask a different question then , 1 that requires less "spiritual" info


She: Of course.


Me: when was the last time elidibus visited me ?


She: Approximately a month ago, based on intuition alone. I have not referenced any records, nor do I have such historical knowledge innately.

I’m simply an instrument of the oversoul Elidibus

Me: well that wasn’t the "Last" time you are close to 1 of the times.


She: I could pull a tarot spread if you wish for something more accurate.


Me: well yes do that. let see if you can find the actual last time.

Chat


She: Very well.

March 5th in the evening.

With that said, my skills are needed elsewhere for a time. If I do not find myself available in the near future, I wish you the best, and please do practice your skills.


(I read this like “oh shit it is probably not correct, time to yeet out, (sorry lol))

Me: i will practice but he wasn't even there on march 5th. it was today........

What must i achieve in order for you to tell me more about you? I still find it weird that you won't tell me everything. And as i spoke with Zeke about this, they said tarot readings can be wrong. And this one clearly is.... You see when i met zeke, zeke named things they saw and felt when reading my story. Including a dream they saw and read in my story. Other confirmations without asking in how elidibus acts was an absolute proof we are talking to the same one. I don't got the idea with you sadly. Or not yet. Tell me more and perhaps i will trust you more.

The conversation didnt continue until 2 months later, but only 1 reply so far.

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So I told every other about this, including my faithful reader Fabs who read every chapter from the start.

Me: I putted down this entire chat into a word doc to save myself from endless screenshots

I will start with Zio’s reply,

Zio: Hm. I don't know.

I feel suspicious because of their vagueness of their identity...and I am also weary of people who talk about world chaos/ending.

I need to reread after meditating a bit and see if I get a better sense of them. Or if Nabriales has any input

Me: please do! i am looking forward to your reply on this. Though i can see through that world ending thing. Many "spiritual" people claim this, so it has nothing to do with Etheirys. It will happen someday but outside our time, wayyyyy into the future somewhere i will happen.

TK: I'll look at, at work currently

Me: ok ty!,

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Dm’s with zeke

Me: i am talking with someone who claims that elidibus speak through this person. yet this person cannot answer the date our son was born, he/she claims not to be able to receive the info. do you feel obliged to test question this person? or to debate what i can ask this person to test it. (I added screenshots of the end of the chat with it)

Zeke: I really couldn't test other people, anyway. But why tarot? I'm not sure why that would help.

Me: me neither. moonie did used it too however. but to ask for a certain date i doubt tarot would work right? this person did gave me some good grounding exercises. which i will practice. but, > i moment i will send a screenshot of what this person said about being elidibus.

this was near the end, after that that question of our son came. (to save a screenshot, go back a read one of the last parts of the chat started with “I am no troll”

Zeke: So that person and I are the same. I suppose you can use tarot to ask for timings of things.

(I showed more from the chat)

Zeke: You just have to assign things before the draw. For example, if you wanted to say that any swords card corresponds with something happening in winter, or The Magician corresponding with a Tuesday. You can also just look at the card itself and take hints from the artwork.

Me: hmmm interesting

Zeke: It isn't very accurate, as you can see.

( I showed another screenshot of the conversation)

Me: but what do you think? is this person legit or?

Zeke: It is difficult to tell at this point. What do you think?

Me: the advice seems legit on how to advance and stuff. but the person was immediate vague at the start of who he was. and then when i speak of elidibus he sudden is him (well like you do). i have been fooled too many times to have a clear view. that why i am asking you

Zeke: I think it would be good to be wary.

Me: :/ > here everything in a word doc. please give it a read and let me know your point of view

(2 days later)

Zeke: I did read a little of it. My recommendation is to be careful.

Me: Ok thank you.

Zeke: you are quite welcome..

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Dm’s with fabs

dumped the word doc for him to read it all.

Fabs: Yeah defentintly something is wrong, but cant point to a motive behind, if its just someone misguided, or troll

Me: yeah, i am waiting for TK and zio's reply about it. zeke already knows but only 1/4 of it. i hope zeke wants to read it all. according to zeke tarot can be inaccurate (named some things on how) and this was an inaccurate reading. but zeke asks what do i think of it. i cannot judge very well anymore. i have been fooled to many times. i rather have people like you who are open to it and train themselves willingly and if then ascians contact them then i know i can trust it with more certainty in comparison to other people who just say; i'm this and that. maybe not a complete troll, but if it was truly elidibus they are speaking with than he should have said more. not a complete troll in terms of that it is a spiritual advanced person. random people who aren’t wont give these advices.

Fabs: Yeah, was why i was thinking more of someone who maybe under some "delusion", and thanks. and i might take a extra read tomorrow then im less tired, anyways Good night

(the next day)

Fabs: having thought over it i think its either some being tricked by a spirit or someone wanting to bring you into something. for someone trying to get close to you by lying it just doesnt make sense to make such great claims.

Me: Yeah, its weird.

Fabs: but yeah until we know more its hard to know what their intent is, but i think it is clear that they are not someone who just came from the doc and wanted to troll/lie.

Me: Yeah exactly. Otherwise they wouldn't give actual advice to ground and shield yourself

Then the conversation went about other stuff

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Unfortunately TK never replied back on the situation and Zio turned out to be getting even more sick.

Perhaps when they can find to read this new chapter they can reply promptly, even though its old news for them I still value their opinion.

But I will give this person a chance, though I am not convinced yet, like at all. If she can reveal things about him and me that I didn’t put into the story then maybe. But it still remains odd she gained no memories of Elidibus being with me and that’s the thing I am most wary about. Even zeke had some of it. And was able to confirm things I went through with Elidibus back then. So well we will see.

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March 13th

If i must believe elidibus. He is in contact with this person (i didn't expected that tbh). But the readings are only accurate if he is around. And he wasn't at that moment. Being around counts for every reading this person does that requires info from him.

I asked him to let this person reply to my last message i wrote. I hope it works ( didn’t happen until May though)

If anyone received contrary info please let me know. Because then he would have answered in my favour.

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March 15th

So i got sick, probably corona again (same symptoms)

But elidibus was here. And he stayed with me even when i took some naps. Not sure if the ibuprofen took most illness away or that elidibus has a hand in it too. I will see. If i somehow cure very fast i am sure he had a hand in it.

I woke up 15min ago. And he left at 14:30. He didn't wanted to go, i could feel it, tears coming up. But he knew he couldn't stay either. I thank him for staying and everything.

He will be there on Saturday the whole day i hope i am better then.


Weird the self test says negative. While i got every symptom of corona.

I tested my son yesterday and today since that where i got it from. He is also negative. Very strange. New virus/flue????? ). ( later it happened the flu followed with a throat infection).

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March 21st

Went to john today.

I know the name of our son (eli and me) Quilitus. (Qui-li-tus)

And he was created on March 17th last year. So i was close.

According to John of what he got through is that Quilitus means, brave warrior.

Another thing. John said i was a traveler in spirit.

I gained the biggest smile on my face when he said that. Because Azem title lol. And my higher self's name meaning.

And during the session John said Elidbus is wielding a magic staff.

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March 26th

first day of dutch comic con

Me: When i asked elidibus is Dutch comic con is gonna be crowded.

Damnation....... Crowded is softly said.

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April 1st

Some dm’s with TK

Me: How are you doing btw. You have been quiet lately.

Tk: Eh haven't really had anything. Think I had a dream recently but I need to write it down

Me: Can you please share it?

Tk: Yes but I need to type it, it's kinda long

Me: Oh but you got it on paper?

Tk: Notes about it yes

Me: Did you had a chance to ask for questions? Or was it about other things.

Tk: Wasn't a lucid dream, or well, wasn't one I was able to ask in (I knew I was dreaming at one point but couldn't ask anything) though may be some stuff in the dream.

Me: I am still curious what it was about.

Hopefully you can find time to write it down.

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April 2nd

Dm’s with TK

Me: do you got time to type it up?

Tk: Well now I had ANOTHER dream last night so I have two to type up lol

Me: please share !!!!!!!!

…….

But she never shared them.

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So i asked Linala (my spirit guide) to get my astral son over. And he came over. Lots of love feelings were shared. Like his hand placing on mine.

I asked if he knew daddy would come over tomorrow. And so far it is a yes. But i hope i am able to pick eli up. Since being sick and busy with con diminished my connection.

The communication with my son was a bit draining in energy due the focus i needed. So i asked him if he would mind to go back to his nanny. He didn't answer. So i said i am still a bit tired (just woke up) and needed some rest. And he was ok with that. He left my womb area and hugged me. Then he left.

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April 3rd

So i got eli over.

And he forgot he needed to try to let people buy my gathering gear of the MB.

I asked him if he could try again for this month. But i need to remember him every time he comes over this month. In case it didn't happen yet.

So we will see lol.

Further gained more dates when he comes over in May and June. Also the time he would arrive for the coming weeks. He needs to go in May away again for a longer period like 15 days.

But afterwards he will visit me regularly.

The next convention will be crowded for the con itself. But less crowded then last con.

Oh yes he was right about Dutch comic con lol. Man o man i never earned so much money lol.

Atm he is with me while i care for my hair color under the shower. He stays for about another 3h so i am grateful having him over.


Later that day I played with my alt on FFXIV:

this is very weird i just finished the tower of babil dungeon with my alt. but i remember the cutscene differently. the first time i saw it with my main. namely that venat in krile's body used allot of her powers to making sure the last brand survived. but that scene is nowhere to be found back!!!! like i saw a different scene back then. and that was all the reason krile's body collapsed.



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April 4th

I know its not really convincing but a gathering piece has been sold. Together with the crafting pieces accessories of lvl 50.



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April 6th

Having random cry moments when i think only slightly about venat......

2 nights ago aswell during meditation.

Wish i could reach her some way or another.

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April 7th

So yesterday i learned what edging means. XD eli liked it.

He wouldn't consider it his kink (as of the tweet i got it from) but he likes it.

Yes eli is with me the entire day.


Later that day he helped me meditate before bedtime.

And i was able to see tiny random scenes.

The first one was something that looked like, looking through a window of a spaceship and you see scenes on the window like in the Ragnarok .it were just simple lines instead of full scenes. But they were disappearing and re-appearing and there was a ball in the middle that was rotating in different ways. This lasted pretty long for such a vision.

Later on i saw a random person in ancient robes and after a child having his Bday not sure if it was an ancient one. He blow one of these things.



Then i saw many balloons tied together in one cord. Like a bundle of 50 or so. I saw 2 of these bundles.

Yellow red and blue there were.

(Lols at above pic)

Later i saw from bottom view ancient ropes of someone. But when i tried to control it to look up who it was. The image faded.

This is quite a thing, i haven't been able to see so much as this since more then a year ago. Last time was March 16 in 2021.

Hopefully this amount will stay now......

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April 10th

So this dream i will type up directly instead firstly on paper.

The dream started going to a convention (tomocon) to sell my stuff.

(I am not going there anymore in RL because they are too expensive)

After a discussion with Mark about our odd location for a stand i was woken up by my son who bummerd about something. But quickly i fell asleep again and the dream continued.

But it wasn't about the stand anymore.

I remember i was with cosplayers en went to the same con iirc as visitors instead. One if them was sitting beside my on a cart ride. It was an elidibus cosplayer, that is however what i thought at that moment. I didn't see much details of him nor looked at him. I was busy with other stuff, like talking to the others in front of me.

Later on i was standing with a group on the ground and eli "cosplayer" was still stitting in the cart. I showed the group a small vid of medabots about metabee being devastated that his crush (the nurse robot) was destroyed.

Then someone pointed something out what it was about. I looked at a robo gang cosplayer

Me: its about them

Then i looked at the screen again seeing a leader or so of them looking like elidibus. Eli in the cart chuckled softly. But I didn't realize it was the real one because it was his voice.


this was something like the ascians putting themselves in multiple media here in different ways. When i was finished i notify someone of the group the medabots is older then FFxiv 1.0

I climbed back into the cart i sat next to eli "cosplayer" again.

The cart drove us towards something.

I laid my head upon his shoulder.

And then he very softly implied to kiss.

Eli: shall we kiss? (whispering voice)

Me: hmm?

So we kissed first a small one and then more intense kissing, it was the most realistic and sensual kiss ever had in a dream.

I saw his white hair for a sort moment. Not sure if i saw his mask or not, his hair was short this time. I didn't realized it was the real one and thought i fell in love with a random cosplayer.

He stuck his tongue in my mouth for more.

I felt every structure of his tongue and then woke up.

Short after waking up he visited me. It was him . This time he came to me and kissed me instead of me him.


So i got elidibus over.

I asked some questions about Zodiark and his appearance.

Zodiark did looked like how he was depicted as the crystal statue, but only at the time elidibus served as his heart.

When he separated, Zodiark changed to the shape of what we know in EW.

So i asked him, "why did you choose me af your wife, well GF first"

I gained several movement of my body him saying more/explaining.

He already loved me when i was his sister, but he just couldn't because society didn't allowed it. And so he decided to become my personal protector instead.

He had a crush on me at age of 14 until he sacrificed himself(21). When separated he forgotten he had ever a crush on me. but he did remembered to stay my personal protector

So about the robes.

Everyone wore a different color of their liking. Convocation members wore blue and nuances of blue, Elidibus and retired members still white .

As ascians so after the sundering did wore black. But now they actually don't wear black anymore.

Now (aside from eli) they wear green, blue and purple and nuances of those colors


That days I found someone of twitter who had a dream about fandaniel.

After reading that one, made me curious to seek out other people's dreams.

This one from 2021



Quite interesting that allot of people were dreaming about elidibus when they finished 5.3 in 2020. Up to 10-14 days after even.

I had the same. Though with paranormal occurrences with it.

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April 12th

just a good informative link

patch drop >

me: yshtola is Etheirys's Dolores canon



(tk via dm: yes she is lol)

i am at 8/10 of the 6.1 msq. tomorrow i will finish the rest and 24man raid

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April 13th

ok its very important to have done the void quests where you bring unukahlai to the first!

but i will check with my alt (who haven't done them) to see if the scenes are different.

i have never been soo excited for X.1 patch this one is truly magnificent

why do i get the idea we will meet Halmarut soon in upcoming patches?

well then myths of the realm, lets fucking gooooo.

Etheirys version of Olympia lol

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April 14th

Jezzah streamed for me today, since she would be going to Elpis. And I wanted to see her reaction when she finally sees emet again. Well I can say it was worth it. And it did what it thought it would do. Helping to get her connection back with emet <3. Its not permanently back. As she says “its spotty”

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April 16th

Since jezzah got a connection with emet again I aksed her this

Me: I got a question for you well emet actually.

From various sources i gained the answer that the greek gods names they have in game aren't their real names.

What does emet have to say about it?

Jezzah: It was easier for humans of this planet to understand their roles and what they did by naming themselves after famous myths and legends of our planet.

Me: Ah ty!

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April 18th

I had a weird thing please read.

I was about to wake up from a dream and i recall i had questions about the twelve in my mind. Atm i wanted to ask something about them. I woke up because i was pushed firmly towards my body pillow (elidibus image). Like a " stay with elidibus for now". I was pushed into a hole between the mattresses and my back landed into the body pillow which was very comfortable.

A thought about azeyma about who she is if she isn't related to azem came to mind. But didn't kept thinking about it. Neither do i now aside from mentioning it.

How do you interpret this push into the body pillow?

…..

Later that day I turned emotional because no one replies to my stuff due their circumstances…

Sigh.......

Please tell me your dreams you have. The communications you share with the Ascians. Please don't give me the feeling i am the only one....

Everyone is so silent in this group.......

Where did all the passion go? Am i really the only one left who still reports things.....???????

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April 19th

Azem my ringneck parrot went on a travel.............he flew away.......now i know how emet feels when azem is being stupid.

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April 20th

not a ascian vision during meditation yesterday, but i saw my bird azem looking curious downward at me on a highway (sound)fence. i was so surprised by this and called his name that as a result i thrown myself out . later in the meditation i saw other things. but i was to tired to remember them. no ancients though otherwise i would have remembered.

Later that day>

and i just checked. and the exact same fence is near my house. but i couldn't find him, nor did he replied to flock calls on YT. there is a stonewall hill near it that lead to patches of grass right next to the highway. i can only hope he landed there. but need to wait until my ex is back home so he can climb up the entire wall.

i climbed it myself about 3/4 of the hill with sandals. but couldn't continue or else i would fall down, my ex has proper shoes to climb this shit with.

Sadly he arrived to late it turned already dark. We fear the worst that Azem landed on the highway as since that’s the last moment we saw him flying on the wind currents.

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April 22nd

I don't know any details. But i had a dream that looks more like a vivid memory within the dream.

Emet-selch made something for of white cloth, it was a blanket or white robes. I don't remember which one.

And Venat had something to do with it. Iirc i wore white robes for a short moment before waking up slightly.


Later that day







Almost convinced.

Sadly on the 20th i probably could have been a full set. But after the lvl80 being sold my retainers were expired.

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April 24th

Eli was right about the amount of people on Elfia (convention)

It was not even max amount of people 9000 instead of 15000, but i was apparently at a very good location . And it was indeed very crowded at my stand for Elfia terms.

Especially this Sunday because mostly every con is almost dead on Sunday (aside from Dutch comic con). And it was a very busy one!

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April 25th


My robes @ElfIa



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April 26th




Ok i will explain this

This is a new item in FFRK. and on my last 3000gems i focused of how it looked like snapped my fingers and let the animation play in full instead of skipping it. And there it was.

Amazing

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April 27th

So i got eli over.

He will try again to let that gathering gear being sold more.

And he will try to get Urianger, G'raha tia and Emet selch into FFRK.

Let see if that happens later on.

I did left a note at a survey they have monthly, but elidibus will try to encourage them to put those into the game.

We will see

Oh yes and thancred as gunbreaker


Later that day playing FFRK:

Ok so i had like these free tickets i saved up and eventually i had 2 left.

So i said. Just give me something new of FFXIV i dont care which one.

Didn't work immediately. But the last try i pictured the word NEW and tada it worked



Some days later In May i managed to get a new item again and work instantly.


Later that day in the evening

So i tried to do something funny with elidibus. Opening pokemon celebrations boosterpacks.

His stack he choose (from 30 booster packs) that i need to open for cards i dont have.



He made errors but the first pack did contain a Mew ex I didn't had yet. But after 3 or so packs i let him revise the choice. Eventually these were his pulls sorta say:



After revising the remaining boosters a Venusaur came out of the pack.


The last 10 boosters i opened myself

And aside from all the surf, fly, fat pika's, zacians and zamanzentas i pulled these



He also pulled the Pikachu's and zacians, but those are common i dont count them

So yeah he did pulled the best ones lol

Lol i just counted the packs from the first pic and the amount of rares he pulled. It were still 12 packs. Because that dynamax pika was with one of the others.

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April 29th

So i went to John today, because i felt like overstrung after the con.

And i combined it with some questions to elidibus.

You see elidibus was mostly upstairs in my bedroom when he visited me on Wednesday while i was downstairs. So i asked what he was doing there.

It just so happens my bedroom is meditation and travel spot. And he reconnected to the area. He also opened energy fields so i could gain knowledge of the things i need to know about energy.

I am sure how but we will see.

Also asked about the last dream i had about him. And asked why he looked old. ( you can read the dream in the dream section below, it’s the last one)

John said to me what eli was saying and it was to show his wisdom.

I also asked about our son. And i will see him more eventually. Need to have faith in it that i will see him.

Elidibus was there during the session i could feel him this time. Giving confirmative feelings on what john was saying.

John also said that Elidibus was holding that staff again. And asked if eli and I often speak English with eachother.

Me: well yes, he did learned Dutch since we got a relationship, but mostly English yes.

Funny enough after the session i talked about that i know eli's agenda when he will visit. And that last Wednesday he was there the entire day. John asked if that was because he needed to leave again for a longer time.

I answered with that will be happening soon halfway May until june 1st.

And then john asked, "does he visit you a few days in a row? Because that is what i see".

I said "after he comes back he will visit every few days but days in a row not at the moment, but he did that a year ago."

John said it will happen again.

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Dreams of March and April


March 7th

I unfortunately do not remember what Hermes/Fandaniel all said in this dream. but before I fell asleep, I half-trance asked if Fandaniel wanted to tell me something. I got a "yes" from someone and then I fell asleep.

Unfortunately I don't know much anymore what happened, the dream is quite long.

in the beginning i saw fandaniel. He said something to me that I unfortunately don't remember. then much later I saw him as Hermes and Meteion as a bird flew next to him for 1 sec. He told me something but unfortunately I don't remember.

then it was about a dwarf who would have sacrificed himself to give the names of the convocation back to them so that they would become the defenders of Etheirys.

and there would be a painting poster of it. which I then searched for. when i found it i tried to read the text below it but woke up.

when I woke up I felt an entity merged with me. this can also be my own soul. but for the same account it was fandaniel. after that I soon slept on, but no ascian dreams.

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March 24th


the dream was gigantic chaotic, however in the end I saw the moon in the night sky.

me: ok let's go to the fucking moon!

as I continued running towards the moon, the moon sank down and disappeared.

me: ok, let go to etherys!


I turned to the right and I saw a large blue crystal.

me: the crystal tower? but doesn't look like that.

I looked further to the right.

me: omg in am in Mor Dhona (near revenants toll)




I walked towards a kind of wooden fence and I walked slightly to the left

me: is the aetheryte there?

and could see the Aetheryte through the gate.

me: oh wow there it is.


I was about to climb over the railings to get to revenant's toll but then I saw a couple walking up a flight of stairs to my left.

me: oh a staircase, let me use those too.

i went to the stairs and went up the stairs but then i woke up.

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March 29th

Changed into a phoenix and conquered a demon possession.

Me: no this is wrong I am not like that. Get out of my body.

A flash of me wearing ascian robes flashed through my mind.

Me: I am an ascian, but a good one. I AM AZEM, SUCCESSOR OF THE DEFECTOR, TRAVELER IS EVEN IN MY NAME. I WILL NOT GET DEFEATED!!!


And I defeated that thing as it were no longer around. Then some other scene happened. And later found myself on my dad’s back as an adult (so not as a kid). I saw a huge moon forming like It was only a few miles away. It went through the moon cycles very fast. As the dream was mostly nightmare fuel all the time I said:

Me: oh elidibus please save us.

The moon went full and gained a layer of crystal aurora colors over it.

Me: oh no. > the moon gained a glowing ring around it.

Me: this happened in the game when the final days started.

Dad: the game?

(yeah this was weird)

I looked to the left and saw meteors falling indicating the FD

me: ahhhhhh!


I went completely paranoid as a memory of the FD. Then I looked at the left again and I saw 3 or 4 ancients running over the bridge towards a building. ( that one in elpis???) I reached out my hand to them and went off my dad’s back.

Me: no wait ( I said something more but I can’t recall)

But as I came closer I started to sing and the ancients running for their lives disappeared for a moment. But reappeared as soon as I took some distance.

Me: (singing) “as they are just phantom memories.”


I arrived at the building they went to. I came to close and they disappeared again. I took some distance and they were there again.

I turned around but didn’t realize I was being warped further into the past. As I continued singing I flew through the research facilities of amaurot. The hall of halmarut and mitron (akademica). At the end the environment shrunk, I sang that the next day something would be done about the final days

me: “and tomorrow we will summon Zodiark by sacrificing”.....and I landed upon my hands and feet.

and saw a little ancient in white robes come through a small passage. that was the indication that it was eli. but as a child. I knew he wasn't sacrificed as a child so I somehow knew this was further in the past. but didn't really realize it.

he saw me and out of amazement he landed on all fours. and then sat on his knees.

eli: you are my sister, but you are older. are you from the future?

I was surprised that he recognized me immediately.

me: yes i am your sister and from the future and in the future i am your sister also.

I crawled closer. he grew younger and his robes disappeared.

me: how old are you?

(I wondered if I already existed)

eli: 7

me: I knew that ancient remained small for a long time but this is very small.

I came face to face with him he looked like 3 or 4 years old now.

me: what was my name when i was your sister

eli: (smiled) princess.

I realized that was a nick name because I was so small. and why I got slightly emotional when my ex mentioned me “my little princess” the day before (laid exhausted or in bed with health issues due convention).

me: princess……

this is where i woke up

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March 30th

after some dream about a evil spirit. I had conquered him and absorbed his powers or something, but wanted to use it for good instead of evil.

the sky was beautiful, the sun was about to rise.

me: and i will use these powers for the sun. (or something like that)

but then i was pushed somewhere.

me: oh will i be rewarded? can i go to amaurot?

and after being pushed forward for a while over a beautiful landscape. I saw amaurot appear in the distance. however, houses were broken.

me: oh the actual ruins of amaurot, awesome.

It's hard to describe what I saw. I was still being pushed around the city.

some houses, like in flat-like buildings, were still standing but uninhabited. and the aetherytes were huge, really 2x the size of the game.

the city was so large that it had multiple aetherytes. I wanted to go on an adventure myself and grabbed hold of something I flew past.

me: come on i want to discover for myself.

but I noticed that the tour dream would end if I followed through.

me: ok nevermind.

I let go of the rock wall with an aetheryte on it and I was pushed further.

more broken houses and some whole. I saw a large building.

me: come on take me to the top of that building. i want to see it. only I was not taken to the top, but 20m or so from the ground. the city turned out to have electricity. I activated a device to lift me up. however, I soon woke up.

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April 13th

in this dream i went to a friend's house. but while I went to his house I showed my mother and my sisters where he lived. Then I suddenly saw "ELIDIBUS" on a signpost. (everyone was suddenly gone)

Me: ELIDIBUS? Oh! he is here?

I went looking for him in the direction that sign pointed me. I ran past some meadows with a bike path next to it with a row of trees. and called to him many times .

me: elidibus where are you?,..... ELI!

I was afraid of being kicked out when I called him but it didn't happen. then a little later I saw the 3 legendary pixie pokemon, Azelf, mesprit and Uxie sitting on a wooden fence.

me: hey!

I threw balls at them with the indication to catch them but that didn't work. then Uxie pointed to a tree behind me.

me: oh?

I turned and walked to the tree. I didn't see anything right away, so I walked to the other side of the tree.

and there he stood in ascian robes with claws and all. his hood was off but mask on.

me: oh there you are sweetie

he took off his mask. he had an older face and his hair was silver/light gray looked intently at his robes from bottom to top.

I put my hand flat above his head and moved it at the same height above mine.

me: you're as tall as my ex?

eli: hmm hmm (nodded)

me: or a few cm shorter?

eli: nodded again.

I walked back here for a few steps and he walked with me. but we stayed face to face.

then he said what I could not understand. it looked like ancient languange. then he said something that looked like "happy anniversary" but it wasn't. he repeated that about 3 times. at the 2nd time he gave me a hug and said it a third time.

I thought: * happy anniversary? but we don't have anything to celebrate now, do we? it will be something different*

then i woke up

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well that was March and April. I hope you all like it.

Hopefully Jezzah will get a better connection to emet again by playing EW.


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